Is Life Fair?

Happy Song

So many times do we express these two words without so much thinking about the real issue at hand. Because of our own expectations, whether real or unreal, these two words “fair” and “justice” often cross our tongues as we fail to accept what is perfect and that we may be imperfect causing things to go bad or bring negative emotions to what we call unfair conditions imposed on us in our lives.

In a perfect world the Fairness Doctrine which states in part that “Life should always be fair and exactly equal for everyone” is an unrealistic expectation to say the least. The reality is that life is filled with setbacks, disappointments and gloom. Balancing life to give us fairness is not often practical as much of this process is based on things you have no control over. Calculating fairness and what you perceive to be fair is a perspective that has little to do with reality.

For starters, if my life was happy all the time, prosperous and void of miserable situations or stress it would be fair to me. However, this fairness belief system has little to do with the reality that life has been unfair to me and that it does not contain happiness all the time nor the other negatives of life as we speak. In other words, it is best I abandon my fairness doctrine and deal with the realities around me.

It can be replaced with the happiness doctrine. It states that I will choose that which contributes most to my and others' happiness. I accept that my life and all my options are a gift. If I compare my gifts to others' especially to those that have more. I will only reduce my appreciation of my own gifts.

There really is some "justice" in this world. What I have been saying about "fairness" is that rigidly holding on to a fairness doctrine can undermine our happiness. However, one concern people express to me is that if they do not hold on to this doctrine, then there will be no justice or consequences.

We live in a world controlled by natural laws which we cannot "break." Natural laws do provide some measure of natural consequences-of rewards and punishments of our actions. Society can also create laws which provide additional rewards and punishments. Frequently the guilty seem to go unpunished. Accepting the fact that the choices you made are your goals for happiness is as close as it get to being fair.