My head in a Vise

 

 I would never suggest you place your head in a vise and try to imagine the pain I feel is real

Tis too painful to do and experience as you may already know if you have fallen in love with romance and career unless your heart is made of steel

There is no other way to express the pain and frustration than telling you plainly, the truth as it hurts

My head in a vise only expresses my objectified pain and suffering like no other emotion as my words are just a bunch of senseless blurts

The romance was doomed from the moment I met you, standing there in all your beauty and glory

There was no way I could be free and at the same time be with you, it could by no means be a never-ending story

My career skyrocketed as the day was long and the pay was abundantly generous, but knowingly, missing you would make me sad and blue

I couldn’t have asked for a more complex moment to decide which one it was I wanted most

And wouldn’t you know it, the boss said it can’t wait as he wanted me to fly now, way over to the west coast

Knowing I can’t have both and that no matter how hard I attempted or try to hold onto my boo

The most powerful component, gluttony, took over and caused me to choose the job over you

Time did not allow me to make up my mind, the way my heart was telling me to think

And herein lies the problem, for the pain inside me, is knowing I will never see you again

Cause I am being awfully selfish and rather be me, than see you in my plan, not knowing when I could see you again as I close my eyes and blink

In lost time and painful reflection, my changeability and mindset took toll and I was missing you so bad

Every day I was awake, as I woke up to go to work feeling oh so lonely and sad

Shaking my head, talking to myself and saying don’t make any excuses and do not living with any regret

My heart kept aching as it was breaking, as your sweet smile and memory I could never forget

And with every empty moment in time, the voices of us being together come back

So instead of walking with my head in the clouds, my head was in vise

Sometime back, I remember a friend telling me the truth, and giving me advice

She said if you love her, you choose love over greed rather than the desire to succeed

But if your mind is set on making the big time, then it is time for you to move ahead

Sitting here with a splitting headache with a vise clamping down on my head

I should have walked away from greed, I should not have wanted so badly

So here I am, alone in my platinum covered with glass penthouse pad

Knowing it was the wrong message for my heart and my head when looking back at what I have become

And suffering daily with an existing mental concept that I want you back

I am crying out loud now, suffering the consequences of my head tightly twisted and feeling very bad

I try to convince myself it’s all in my head and that I am not really feeling so sad

Ignoring the totality and facts, that I have fallen off my perch up there in my penthouse pad

Making the lushly green colored money and knowing it’s all in my overprized head

I can feel the instability and pain appear again, as a solo tear falls from my eye down my cheek

Thinking how my life has turned into darkness with my broken heart feeling oh so blue and bleak

Working hard on trying to explain this metaphor of my head being inside a vise driving me mad

I toss and turn each night I think of you, as I lay still here in my exaggerated lonely king size bed

But no matter how hard I try or cry to leave your memory or face behind, the vise is still tightly wrapped around my head